Dreams

This is the post I was too afraid to post before...

My conscious mind doesn't think about you. My conscious mind doesn't worry about you. My conscious mind doesn't miss you.... but obviously my subconscious mind does.

I've had a few dreams about you since you left. I really hate them...
I dream about the past and future, of good times already spent and a future I'll never have. I wake up feeling destroyed and empty. I go through the day feeling rejected and alone.

My conscious mind can't get rid of the photo of us... but it also can't even glance at the faces still smiling behind the glass.

My subconscious mind compares others to you. My subconscious mind tends to drift off, wondering what you're doing (or who). I can't handle to even say your name out loud...

I want to hate you... I want to be able to blame you for wanting to end it... I want to take the easy road out and just turn my back on you as if you'd been in the wrong. But even my conscious mind knows that you did nothing wrong...

Something has to give... and I'm afraid its going to be me

Thanks to a certain Academy boy I can't stop thinking about recently, I haven't really been worry about any other boy... so I guess that's a plus?